Do you know what the deadliest animal in North America is? Harvest is winding down, so it is time for me to write an article about deer, grandchildren, combines and flat tires. I will also add some plagiarism of a famous Tom Hanks quote.
Combines are harvesting the fields at a very brisk pace with the gorgeous weather that has lingered in Will County. I was unfortunate enough to show up at my combine one morning and find a rear tire resting on the rim due to a flat tire. That repair was simple and inexpensive compared to the repair my friend had today.
He was combining corn when the machine went crooked and tilted. A quick inspection showed a large front tire was flat, punctured by the antler of a deer. The tire truck made a service call in the field and confirmed the tire was unrepairable. It was 8 more hours and $12,000 later before the combine was back in operation. That sticker shock might be enough to make me cry had it been my tire.
Not only do the whitetail deer kill more people, 58 in a year due to vehicle crashes, per an article I read, the males shed their antlers every year. Many outdoor enthusiasts will hunt for “deer sheds;” what a blessing it would have been if this antler had become part of a collection before it found a tire.
Katie bought hay from me on a Monday for her horses. Later that night she asked if her grandson, who has an infatuation with watching machinery work, could come watch me harvest. I did one better, I let them ride in the combine and he even got to drive. I am not certain who enjoyed it more. The ride was not without incident. When Katie tried to hand her grandson, Boe, to me in the combine, he started to cry in a panic. I used the line, “There is no crying in farming.” He did not get my reference to the famous Tom Hanks line from the movie, “A league Of Their Own.” Go figure, he is only 3. Several years ago, when my oldest grandson was only 2, he also cried while he rode with me combining soybeans. I hope it isn’t me!
A disparaging or funny, depending on your perspective, joke asks, “What is the difference between a puppy and a farmer? The puppy will eventually grow up and quit whining.
Had I been in my friend’s shoes today, if I didn’t cry a little, I most certainly would be whining for a long time at such an expensive repair over something so out of your control.
In the future I would like to advise every hunter and any guest in my combine cab to shoot every male deer you see or run them over with your car. Well maybe not, given my previous statement.
Also, “There is no crying in baseball”, even for White Sox fans like myself after last year.
0 Comments